Baggage

For the past couple of Wednesdays, a sweet, timid, middle-aged woman has been showing up at church.  She comes in with a large backpack and about four or five more bags filled with who knows what.  She tucks them all around her on the floor.  She doesn't want any help bringing them in from her car or through the door.  If someone touches her or them, she gets a bit frantic.  From what she says and does, I realize that she is coping with mental illness.


As I watched her, I realized that she wasn't the only one who had brought extra baggage to church that night. Oh, some of us hid it better than she did, but we still came in juggling bags and then tucked them nice and tight around us.  They do help insulate us.  And help build a protective wall.


How do I know there were others with baggage?  Well, some have let me peek into some of their bags.  So I know some of what they're carrying.  But, basically I know because I brought in all kinds of baggage with me that night.  Some helped insulate me.  Some just made it hard to juggle the rest.


Jesus asks us to lay all of our stuff at His feet. (1 Peter 5:7)  If we seem to get a bit frantic at that thought, He doesn't grab or snatch the stuff out of our hands.  Can you imagine the searing pain of that? No, instead He comes along side of us, puts His loving arms around us, asks us to open just one bag, and then lovingly helps us unpack.

2012

Whew.  It's over.  2011, that is.

I'm emotionally drained.  But, I am slowly recovering and hope to be in ship-shape in not too long!

In all the sadness, in and amongst all the stress, there were two miracles.  Two little baby boys were added to our family.  Caleb Journey was born to Josh and Serena on July 27 (remember I was in Colorado in July?)

and River Arvin was born to Gana and Daja on October 3.

Oh, we do love babies around here!  Those two brand new ones redeemed 2011 for me.  Without them, I'd be hard-pressed to find the good.

Well, the "big" good, anyway.  God is always good and gives us so many every day wonders, that there is always good.  Always a gift from Him.  Always a smile to find.

It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.  They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.  The Lord is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him.  Lamentations 3:22-24

And now it's 2012.

New Years Day landed on a Sunday this year.  What a wonderfully clean slate it represented.  A new day, a new week, a new month, and a new year!

Today my husband and I sat down to map out our goals and dreams for 2012.  No resolutions, just regrouping.  We'll do it again at the beginning of February.  Either to pat ourselves on the back or to kick ourselves back into action!

For the past few years, I've been choosing a word for the year.  Naming it, if you will.  I named 2011 FREEDOM.  2010 was the year of YES.  Do I sometimes forget what year it is as the months roll by?  Well, yeah.  But, it usually doesn't take too long before the year's name comes calling me back.

2012 is being named "RELEASE".  Not the most common of names, but a very personal one.  This is our year to release pain and illness, to release negative financial concerns, and to release excess possessions.  We are also opening our hearts, hands, and bodies to receive freedom and health.

Hey, 2012 is looking pretty good sitting there all clean and new!

Summer 2011 Manifesto

Well......Spring didn't go exactly as I had planned.  I'm not sure I have any expectations that summer will, either.  *sigh* 

So, I think I'm going to go nice and simple here.  I hope having this posted in front of me will help keep me focused.  Odd that I've come to a point where I have to focus on having fun.  *another sigh*  So, without further ado, here's to my summer - with a little commentary by Winnie-the-Pooh.

I will get sunshine

and go barefoot on the grass.

“Always watch where you are going. Otherwise, you may step on a piece of the Forest that was left out by mistake.”

I will “just do the next thing”

without anxiety.
“Rivers know this: there is no hurry.
We shall get there some day.”

I will take each day slowly --

no matter how fast the season scurries.

“Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear,

and not bothering.”

I will have fun.

“When late morning rolls around and you're feeling a bit out of sorts, don't worry; you're probably

just a little eleven o'clockish.”

 

Five Minute Friday: If I Knew I Could, I Would...

It's Friday!  Time for Five Minute Friday hosted by The Gypsy Mama.  The rules are simple:  Throw caution (editing, revising, and worrying) to the winds and just write for five minutes flat. Without wondering if it’s just right or not.  Here we go.  Today's prompt:  If I Knew I Could, I Would . . .

GO.

If I knew I could, I would . . .


Save the world.

Heal the heartache.

Gather the brokenhearted and just give them a hug.

Spend all the money that’s needed to make sure no one is going to bed hungry.

Protect all the unborn babies from the selfishness of their mothers.

Bring back my father’s mind and soul.

Give my mother true joy and peace….and a good night’s sleep.

Guarantee my children and grandchildren a life without the pain that goes on forever.

Express the love I truly feel inside.

Convince every soul that Jesus gave up everything just for them.

Be the person I envision myself to be.

Be fully awake spending every bit of life I have for Him.

STOP.

Five Minute Friday: The Hard Love

Gypsy Mama hosts Five Minute Friday.  This is my first time participating, but it sounds fun...and good for me.

The rules are simple.  You take her prompt and write for 5 minutes flat with no editing or tweaking.

So, here goes.

HARD LOVE


GO.

Hard love. Isn’t all love hard? Selfishness gets in the way of love all the time. We want to esteem others better than ourselves (as the Word says), but maybe later. Right now, I’m just tired. Right now, I just don’t feel like it.

Today’s Good Friday. I am so glad that Jesus didn’t feel the way I do so often. But, maybe He did. He just didn’t let it stop Him. Who knows? He was human. He did fall carrying that cross up the hill of Golgotha. He was tired. He felt the pain. The physical pain. The emotional pain. I’ve watched The Passion of the Christ. I know how much physical pain He bore. But, I think the emotional, spiritual pain must have been so much worse. Can you even imagine what carrying EVERYONE’s guilt must have felt like? I can barely bear my own. All of our guilt. All of our sorrow. All of our shame. All of our pain.

That’s hard love. How can I not love Him back?

STOP.

Spring 2011 Manifesto

(Double click on graphic to view in larger format.)

Preparing for Lent

"It is not repentance that saves me;

repentance is the sign that I realise

what God has done in Christ Jesus."

~Oswald Chambers

Over breakfast this morning, Daja's family was discussing Fat Tuesday tomorrow, Ash Wednesday and the beginning of Lent.  Belgee, her soon-to-be 4 year old says, "I'm fasting Puttanesca."

Definitely a child of a foodie.  I had to go look it up.  I had no idea what Puttanesca was.

But, I have been thinking of Lent.  I am preparing.  Last night I made a folder for the blogs that I will be reading during the season.  See, I’m giving up my Google Reader. Sounds strange, right?  Google Reader is supposed to be a simplifying tool!  And it is, but I just have so many blogs that I want to read each day.   So, I made a folder for the blogs that I will be reading during Lent – my family’s, a FEW good friends, and some devotional types.  I’m giving up most of my craft, decorating, cooking, thrift, health, and organizational blogs -- and the folder labeled “People I Know”. Yep, lots of blogs I just can't seem to live without. We’ll see what happens after Easter. Maybe I’ll go back to them; maybe just some of them; maybe none.


Last year I gave up Facebook. It was a bit difficult to pull away, but it was SO good for me. It put my even being on Facebook in perspective and gave me freedom. I think that’s one of the reasons for any discipline. Discipline really does give you freedom. I’m going to say that again. Discipline gives you freedom! Amazing how that works. Just like dying to live and giving to receive.


I read a good post this morning by Edie from life{in}grace regarding Lent for those of us who are not Catholic, or even from a liturgical church. No, Lent is not a scriptural command. But, fasting, repentance, prayer, and discipline are. Following the church calendar just helps us not forget those harder things when we are celebrating the “fun” things like Easter and the Resurrection.

"In many cultures there is an ancient custom

of giving a tenth of each year's income to some holy use.

For Christians, to observe the forty days of Lent

is to do the same thing with roughly a tenth of each year's days.

After being baptized by John in the River Jordan,

Jesus went off alone into the wilderness

where he spent forty days asking himself

the question of what it meant to be Jesus.

During Lent, Christians are supposed to ask

one way or another what it means to be themselves...

to answer questions like this is to begin to hear something

not only of who you are but of both what you are becoming

and what you are failing to become.

It can be pretty depressing business all in all,

but if sackcloth and ashes are at the start of it,

something like Easter may be at the end."

~Frederick Buechner

So, even though I am from a non-denominational, evangelical church, I will be observing Lent. Even though I may not be giving up Puttanesca.

In Search of the Perfect Makeup Primer

Years ago, I didn't need makeup primer.  In fact, I didn't need foundation, either.  Well, times have changed.  To be more exact, time has changed my skin.  You don't think it will ever happen to you and one day you wake up and wonder whose skin this is.

Why does one need primer?  Mainly to minimize the look of pores and fine lines.  Foundation will then be able to be applied smoothly, evenly, and won't fade away.  Some younger faces like to just use the primer without foundation. 

This is my journey towards finding the perfect primer.  At least the last three products I've used.  I got hooked on primer when I tried Aloette's Flawless HP Rapid Skin Perfection.  Yes, that's a long name for a small product.  However, it is fantastic!  I have very large pores (especially on my nose, as do many oily-skinned) and this wonderful stuff made them virtually disappear.  However, I had received it as a hostess gift.  When I went to reorder, I realized this wonderful stuff costs $59.95 for 1 ounce!  Yikes.  With somewhat of a private martyr's attitude, I didn't place an order.

I am an Arbonne consultant.  I don't sell, I just buy at a reduced rate.  I ordered their Makeup Primer.  List price:  $36.  It made my skin feel silky, but didn't do the job of hiding pores even half as well.

Then I found Urban Decay's Complexion Primer Potion - Pore Perfecting.  Another very long name.  If Aloette is a 10, Urban Decay is a 9.75.  It really is good.  And with a list price of $30, it's half the price!  In fact, you can get it on Amazon even cheaper.  Urban Decay also has a Brightening formula.  In case that's what you may need/want/can't live without.  (Full disclosure:  No one is paying me anything to write this post.  I just thought I'd share this oh-so-highly valuable information.  But, if you click on "Amazon" or "Brightening" above, it will go to my Amazon associate link.  Just so you know.)

Oh, two more things.  All of the above products make your skin feel wonderful.  And all of the above products last quite a long time.  You don't have to buy the product very often. 

Perhaps I've done you a great service and this makeup primer review gave you just the solution you've been looking for.  Or perhaps not.

Scripture Memorization

One of my goals for this year is to memorize one Scripture passage (not necessarily just one verse) a week.  So far, so good.  Today, via Ann Voskamp, I found this great (and free) memory aide.  I tried it out and it is awesome!  Go take a look.  Try it out with John 3:16.  I've got a widget over to the right from there with my current Scripture.

Why memorize Scripture? 

Chuck Swindoll wrote, "I know of no other single practice in the Christian life more rewarding, practically speaking, than memorizing Scripture... No other single exercise pays greater spiritual dividends! Your prayer life will be strengthened. Your witnessing will be sharper and much more effective. Your attitudes and outlook will begin to change. Your mind will become alert and observant. Your confidence and assurance will be enhanced. Your faith will be solidified." (Growing Strong in the Seasons of Life [Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1994], p. 61).

Dallas Willard says in a piece entitled Personal Soul Care, "This practice of memorizing the Scriptures is more important than a daily quiet time, for as we fill our minds with these great passages and have them available for our meditation, 'quiet time' takes over the entirety of our lives."

But the best reasons of all are found in the Scriptures themselves.  Here are only two of that multitude of reasons:

"Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee."  Psalm 119:11

"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path."  Psalm 119:105

Winter Manifesto

2011

banner pattern by Tracey from Notes From a Cottage Industry

Naturally, this time of year, there’s a lot of talk about goals and the love/hate relationship we have with New Year’s resolutions. Instead of resolutions, I like to start my new year with a clean slate of what I’d like my coming year to look like. I do try to write down some goals and some aspirations. The past few years, I’ve given the coming year a word or name that summarizes my goals, my mission statement, my vision for the year.

A vision is how you see your life to be in the future (what you will be).

Goals are how you will accomplish your vision.

A mission statement is a short, concise statement of purpose.

Last year, my word was “Yes.” I think I’ve used “graciousness” a few times. (It’s a big motivation behind my personal vision.) This year, I’ve been vacillating between several words.

I’ve written about vision before. About having a vision. About having a written-down vision. That not having a vision in writing is the same as not having one.

Having written goals is as important as having a written vision--if you are planning to accomplish them. Goals without a vision can get you going in too many directions. Goals with a vision keep you focused and give you a great impetus to success.

So, to keep my focus, I’m once again going to name my year. Words I have contemplated for 2011: Here, Balance, Organize.

But, I think I’m going with FREEDOM.

Freedom from stress,

freedom from clutter,

freedom from debt,

freedom from the past,

but most importantly, freedom to be who God wants me to be.

Giving Thanks, Day Nine

Rest.

Ezekiel taking a break right before his Little Dragons Karate class.

To be honest, resting and sleep is a difficult thing for me.  I love sleeping -- once I'm sleeping.  I just have a hard time going to sleep.  And resting may be even harder.  There are so many things that need to be done. 

Have you heard that line, "I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours"?  Well, that's not me.  Nope, it stresses me out that things are undone.  Now, that does not mean I'm not a procrastinator; it just means I'm stressed quite a bit!  So, I find myself always working.  Or feeling guilty that I'm not.

But God created me a human being, not a human doing.  (Yes, that might be becoming cliche, but true, nonetheless.)  So, I'm learning about rest.  That rest is a gift from God. 

Today was one of those days -- a gift from God.  Oh, I did stuff.  But, I also sat.  And rested.  Yes, a little strange.  But, oh, so good. And I am trying not to feel guilty.  I guess I could do with some lessons from Ezekiel -- and maybe one of those exercise balls.

Giving Thanks, Day Eight

Grace: 

A manifestation of favor;

favor shown in granting a delay or temporary immunity.

Rhema (l., 2yo) was in time-out.  Sitting alone in the living room.  Saraa (r., 1yo) saw her all alone and climbed up to visit.  A little bit of child-like grace.

When we don't get what we deserve

That's a real good thing, a real good thing

When we get what we don't deserve

That's a real good thing, a real good thing

(Newsboys, Real Good Thing)

Are you like me?  In need of some grace from God?  Did you know it's free?  You don't have to earn it!  And you can't.  It's unmerited and freely given.  And even better than Saraa's grace, God's grace is not temporary or a delay.  It is forever!

Giving Thanks, Day Seven

Yep.  I'm a believer in tithing.  And I'm so thankful for God's plan of provision.

I am in awe of God's amazing work of grace in the act of tithing.

It is an act of repentance.  (Malachi 3)

It is honoring God first with what we trade our lives for every day.

And it is how God bestowes upon us His many abundant gifts and blessings.

I like to be blessed.  I like increase.  I think God's plan is a mighty fine plan.

Autumn Manifesto

Inspired by both last day of may and in other words..., I present my:

Autumn Manifesto

1. On chilly days, I will remember to drink tea.



2. I will invite people into my home to “Share the Harvest” -- my theme this season.



3. I will put thought into our meals to make them both tasty and comforting.



4. I will place pumpkins and fall decorations throughout the house – and keep tweaking it all season to keep it fun.

5. I will use pumpkin and apples freely in my cooking and baking.

Pumpkin Spice Oatmeal Cookies

 

6. I will light my candles and little lamps as dusk falls to make my home cozy feeling.



7. I will visit Farmers' Markets more frequently.



8. I will pay more attention to the journaling of my life (this blog).



9. I will use my Silhouette Machine.



10. I will let my gym see my face more often.



11. I will complete my 10-day Give (which I forgot about the first time around).



12. I will go outside every day just to breathe.

13. I will buy some tights. And look for a new coat.

14. I will use my stationery.

15. I will trust God and my husband as I discover grace.

What Are Your Ultimate Concerns?

Are they reflected in how you spend your time?

“But, far too many of us confuse the Gospel of Christ with the American Dream. Instead of our highest and most motivating aims being serving God and conforming our lives to his will, we avidly pursue college credentials, lucrative career, large home, nice things, financial security and ease of life. In effect, academic and material possessions become our gods, as well as the measure by which we judge others. No, we don't bow down before them, but as much as these are what primarily motivate and interest us--and are our ultimate concerns in life--they take a dubious place beside the Lord Almighty.”

(Homeschooling or Discipleship? By Wendy Bush)

I’m not a homeschooler anymore, but this quote got me to thinking about our “gods”. The last part of the paragraph says, “but as much as these are what primarily motivate and interest us--and are our ultimate concerns in life--they take a dubious place beside the Lord Almighty.”

What primarily motivates and interests us in our daily lives? What are our ultimate concerns? When I was younger, I would imagine someone making a documentary of my life. Filming the road to my house. Showing the fun stuff I was involved in. Of course, I was always interesting. Probably more so in my imagination than in real life. However, it is an ingenious way to look at your life.


What if someone were to document your life in film, what would we see? I pray it wouldn’t bore us to pieces as we watched you watching television late into the night or sit at the computer day in and day out, or anger us as we watched you yell and belittle your children or your spouse, or hurt us when we saw you never paying attention to the beauty and love around you. What would it show were your primary interests and motivations? Would there be any “ultimate concerns” in life taking their place next to the throne of God? When we watched you spending your time, would we cheer or cry?

It's the itty bitty things that add up in life.

Most of us are dreaming, wishing, praying for something to happen. A clean house, a new house, a new direction in life, a ministry to be birthed, getting out of debt, losing weight, toned abs, something. And as fervently as we pray, or as tight as we squeeze our eyes while wishing, it doesn’t happen. We’re hoping for the lightening from heaven, the miracle, the lottery win. Odds are that none of that will happen.

But life can change. It does change. It will change. Only it will be one step at a time. Not giant steps. Not even regular steps. Baby steps. When you drive a car at night, you never see further than your headlights. However, you can make your whole trip that way. Progress is not made by huge leaps toward success, but by baby steps.

Life is made up of choices. When you choose A, you cannot choose B. If you choose B, then you are closing the door to A. You cannot have both. You want to be debt-free? You want financial freedom? Then you will need to make a decision over every penny that lands in your pocket. You must choose if a) that penny will go towards paying off a bill or b) go towards that candy bar or that wonderful sale item you found while shopping. If you choose A, then you cannot have B. If you choose B, you cannot have A. Which one do you want more? Which one will benefit you more? Which one will get you to your goal? Ah, but it’s only a penny you say. Yes, but it is the little foxes that spoil the vine (Song of Solomon 2:15). It is not the great big decisions, the giant steps, in life where we usually stumble; it is in the small little choices.

Every choice we make will either bring us closer to our goal or further away from it.

It truly is the itty bitty things that add up in life.

I Just Can't Make Up My Mind

Comedian Brian Regan has a bit where he talks about his favorite flavor of snow cone as a child. Grape. Oh, but cherry is also his favorite. So, they are both his favorites. But, maybe grape is his most favorite. He just can’t make up his mind.



I can so relate. I have such a problem trying to figure out my favorite food, my favorite color, or my movie. I also don’t have a favorite Bible verse. So very unreligious of me, isn’t it? Oh, I have a lot of verses that I love, that mean a great deal to me, that minister to me, that overwhelm me. But to pick a favorite, I just can’t seem to do. Sometimes I pick one, but the next time I read the Word, I find another one. Maybe that one will be my favorite. But, then something else comes leaping off the page to me. I just can’t choose. So, they are all my favorites. Yet again, maybe this one is my favorite.


At this time, my favorite verse to convict me to pieces is 1 Corinthians 9:27, “But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.” Yikes!


My favorite verse to keep on keeping on is Joshua 1:7, “Only be thou strong and very courageous, that thou mayest observe to do according to all the law, which Moses my servant commanded thee: turn not from it to the right hand or to the left, that thou mayest prosper withersoever thou goest.”


My favorite verse of promise is Psalm 103:2-5, with an emphasis on verse 3 when I’m feeling ill, “who healeth all thy diseases”!


The latest one that grabbed me was a few days ago – Jeremiah 2:11b, “But my people have traded my Glory for empty god-dreams and silly god-schemes.” Ah, so very sad.


My favorite Psalm to sing is Psalm 19:7-11. Or maybe it’s Psalm 150.


Psalm 150:2, “Praise him for his mighty acts: praise him according to his excellent greatness.” YES! Maybe this is my most favorite.

6:33 Club

Matthew 6:33 in the Amplified Bible says, “But seek (aim at and strive after) first of all His kingdom and His righteousness (His way of doing and being right), and then all these things taken together will be given you besides.” Those “things” are the daily things of life – what we are going to eat, drink, and wear. Basically, the cares of each day.



God is calling us anew to seek him first. We need to go to God first – when we have a need, when something good has happened, when we need advice, when we go about our daily chores, when a decision has to be made, when life is good, and when it doesn’t seem to be. He should be the One who hears all of our good news first and He should be the One who directs our doings and goings each day.


There is only one way this is going to happen. We need to stay in constant communication with Him. We don’t just need to pray once a day. We need to pray hundreds of prayers each day. The prayers may just be a word or a short sentence. And we also need to listen all day. We need to be on the alert that He may speak to us at any time.


But, we also need to set aside a part of our day to fully spend time with Him each day. Jesus gave us a good example of this. Though Jesus was one with the Father, He felt a need to get away by Himself and spend time with His Father one on one. How much more would it seem we would need such a time? Mark 1:35 tells us, “While it was still night, way before dawn, he got up and went out to a secluded spot and prayed.” (The Message) Because Jesus spent quality time with the Father before the day began, He was able to move in the will of God without hesitation throughout the day. He did not have to stop and “pray about it,” as we hear Christians say so often. He had already received what He needed for that day.


I am challenging each of you to join the “6:33 Club” with me! Let’s seek Him first! Let’s meet one on one with Him in the morning before our day starts. Before anything – before we eat, before the kids are up, before we read our email, before we get on our way.


In the morning You hear my voice, O Lord; in the morning I prepare [a prayer, a sacrifice] for You and watch and wait [for You to speak to my heart]. Psalm 5:3 (Amplified Bible)


Yes, it might be a sacrifice. But the rewards will outweigh the effort to get out of bed a little early. As your day unfolds, you will see how much better and smoother your day goes when you are prepared. In fact, you might find you’ll want to set your “opportunity clock” earlier and earlier as your time with your Lord gets sweeter and sweeter.

"You Gotta Serve Somebody"